Fear the wrath of the Klingon
Empire,
for it is poised to destroy
us.
Here is what to look out for:
This is a typical Klingon warrior.
Note the forehead ridges
( a dead giveaway that you're
dealing with a Klingon).
Also note the Bat'Leth, his
really, really sharp weapon.
Don't believe me that they're
coming?
This picture was recently picked up
by the Hubble Space Telescope:
It clearly shows two Battle Cruisers
and a Bird of Prey
heading right towards us.
What do you have to say to that,
skeptics?
Need more proof than that? Fine.
Advance scouts have already
been sited all over Earth.
Look at these pictures and tell
me what you see:
It looks to me like a Klingon
at Duke University and
J.R.'s, the world's largest
junk dealer.
Honestly, skeptics, tell me
you don't see that.
What can we do?
Brush up on your Klingon. I suggest buying this:
It's for sale whereever fine books are sold.
Also, practice Bat'Leth or hand-to-hand combat.
Neither of these will really
help, though, since
Klingons are utterly ruthless.
I suggest that if you have anything
important to say
to loved ones, get to it. Or,
you can always just leave the planet.
Douglas Adams lists 5 ways to leave the planet.
1. Phone NASA 713-483-3111, and
explain to them that it's
very important that you get
away as soon as possible.
2. If they do not cooperate,
phone any friend you have
in the White House 202-456-1414,
to have a word
on your behalf with the guys
at NASA
3. If you don't have friends
at the White House, phone the
Kremlin 0107-095-295-9051. They
don't have any
friends there either, but they
do seem to have a little
influence, so you may as well
try.
4. If that fails, phone the pope
for guidance. His phone
number is 011-39-6-6982, and
his switchboard is infallible.
5. If all these attempts fail,
flag down a passing flying saucer
and explain that it's very important
that you get
away before your phone bill
arives.
(- Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy)